Friday, May 18, 2012

Ten


Dear Cody,
Ten years ago we said, “I do,” and our adventure began.  If given the chance, I wonder what would I say to twenty-one-year-old me on our wedding day.  First, I think I’d point out how young we were.  Really young.  Some might say, stupid young. But young or not, I’d tell me not to take this man in front of me for granted.  I’d want to make twenty-one-year-old me understand that God chose you just for me.  That He hand-picked you with me in mind.  God chose well.  So well.  I could never have truly comprehended this in that moment standing at the front of the church in my white dress that I had dreamed about since childhood, but I would find out in the years to come.  I would get to see just how blessed that day was, ten years ago.

What I found, in the past decade of my life, was not a perfect husband, but a man who loves me deeply, my flaws and all.  What I found was not someone who could fix all of my problems or heal all of my heartaches.  What I found was a friend, a best friend, who is willing to walk through a fire with me, arm in arm, with eyes fixed on the One who can solve every problem and heal every heartache.  

I wish I could say that the past ten years have been pure bliss; that we never, ever fight, or say stupid things.  I wish I could say that every year since our wedding day was filled with happiness, but that’s not life.  I have come to realize that life is messy, and it’s OK.  I am not perfect. You are not perfect. But if we trust in Him and His perfect will, He promises to be with us every step of our journey.  

Sometimes I wish we could get a travel itinerary, a schedule of events about to take place, so we could plan accordingly.  But, God does not operate that way.  We are on a need to know basis and some stuff we just don’t need to know right now.  Like where we will be in the next ten years.  What is on the horizon, I wonder?  Maybe if we could see ourselves at year twenty, there would be no need to trust in Him to get us there safely.  Or maybe we’d just jump ship and bail.  I look back on our journey to here and smile, thinking about how much life has taken place since the day we said, “I do.”  

I look forward to the days when the sun is shining on us, but I’ll take the storms as well.   Because it’s in the darkness of the scariest storm that He brings His peace, and reminds me that He’s given you to me for times like these.  He reminds me that we are not alone. That arm in arm, following Him, we can get through anything.  Anything.
 
I’m just so glad I get to share my messy life with you.   I love you!
Kel
Hanauma Bay, Hawaii

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